2 September 2019 – Happy/Sad Dance Time
You may be noticing that last month’s “Purple Patches of Perfection” are rapidly turning white/pale -pink as the beautiful Rose-Bay Willow-Herb prepares to shed its feather-like seeds to ensure the perpetuation of plenty of purple patches of perfection next year. (Can you hear Elton John singing “The Circle of Life” from the Lion King in the background?)
My good news from August is that our house is now under offer. Yay! A cause for celebration for both ourselves and the lovely couple who seemed to fall instantly in love with it. However, I have found myself feeling deeply sad at the prospect of leaving our long-time nest. This is the down-side of selling before you buy and therefore not being able to clearly imagine the good times we are moving towards.
To avert the sadness, I am keeping busy, searching for our next nest. Our diary for the next few weeks looks like an American tourist’s holiday itinerary for north east Scotland, e.g “It’s Tuesday, so it must be St Cyrus. 😊”
I know that once we’ve found somewhere that ticks all our boxes, our spirits will rise again as we imagine ourselves in our new home.
Having listened to BBC Radio 4’s Woman’s Hour last Friday, on the difficulties of renting at 50, and beyond, when life hasn’t quite gone to plan, I have a new appreciation for how lucky we are to be able to consider buying again. If you missed the program you can still catch it on the iPlayer Radio app. (The renting related part starts at about 16 mins into the program.
My goal for September is obvious: stay positive, find a new house and finalise a move out/in date. Sounds simple and hopefully it will be.
Whatever emotional rollercoaster you are travelling on this month, I hope you can embrace the thrill of it all and sow seeds for good memories to cherish in the future.
Life-coaching can be a huge support through life-changes. My focus is on mid and later life changes, as this can be the best and yet the most challenging time of our lives. Contact me if you wish to discuss how I can assist you.
1 August 2019 – Purple Patches of Perfection
It’s August already and I realise that I haven’t blogged since May. This year is flying in.
I have been inspired to blog today after a lovely morning bicycle ride, surrounded by huge banks of gorgeous Rose-Bay Willow-Herb. Seeing her return each summer is like saying “hello” to an old friend. Her long, slender stems dance in the breeze and add vibrant, purple patches against the lush shades of green in the verges.
When life is full of change it’s reassuring to see the steady, recurring rhythms of nature.
This summer it has become clear that Stuart (hubby) and I had been holding on to out-dated thinking and perspectives, while our lives have moved on. Instead of embracing and adapting to new situations we had been resolutely ignoring the impact of occurrences in recent years and we were continuing doing what had worked for us before.
After realisation dawned, we at last took stock and it’s been a freeing and liberating process.
The end result is our decision to make a complete fresh start. There’s no need for us to stay in the central belt of Scotland for work commitments now that Stuart has retired. I can work from any location. We’re selling up and heading North to live by the sea, which always has been our long-term goal.
After enjoying over 19 years in our quiet, leafy cul-de-sac, we will be sad to say goodbye to our lovely, comfortable home and perfect neighbours. As so often before, this quote for Anais Nin resonates strongly for me.
“And the day came when the risk to remain tight in a bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom.”
Life outside our old, familiar comfort-zone beckons. It’s going to be nerve-wracking and exciting, but there’s no growth if we let ourselves become too set in our ways. Wherever we move to there is sure to be my old friend the Rose-Bay Willow-Herb nearby.
No doubt I’ll be sharing the journey in my blog over the forthcoming months, as I strive to maintain calm with a hubby and two cats, none of whom like disruptions of any sort.
I think this project is an omelette and eggs will be broken, but the result will be delicious. 😊
26 May 2019 – Who do you work for?
Followers of 3RO will have noticed that I am blogging less frequently this year. I made a difficult decision last year, to focus my energies in another direction. I put 3RO on the back-burner for a while and I have been re-directing life-coaching enquiries to trusted colleagues.
To my surprise, I have had an enjoyable year and so I am going to continue to focus on my government-related contract work for the time-being.
When I originally escaped from corporate employment in 2013, I was thrilled and very proud to at last be my own boss. The last six years has taught me that, regardless of employment status with HMRC or the source of my income, I am always working for myself.
My previous reference to escaping the corporate world was a reflection of my own negative perspective at that time. Since then I have worked longer hours and far harder than ever as the director of 3RO Ltd, but these self-motivated activities have never felt like a chore because they are my choice. Setting up my own company empowered me, broadened my knowledge and enabled me to meet many fascinating people.
For the present, I am enjoying being committed to a contract again, because it is one that enables me to continue to deliver excellent customer service to people who benefit from that service. I am continuing to use and hone my life-coaching muscles, as well as learning new skills and making new connections. Every day brings fresh opportunities to rise to new challenges.
Even in a corporate situation, we can influence our environment for our own satisfaction and happiness, and then share the results with colleagues. Ensuring we benefit holistically (not just financially) from work, enables us to better serve our business and community, and be good company for the people who share our lives.
We can be exquisitely flexible and we can make a change whenever we wish.
So, who do you work for? 🙂
29 March 2019 – Your giant, powerful magnet
Social media and the news media in general often give me a sense of overload. So much depressing news. So many interesting articles, books, videos and pod-casts. I struggle to find the time to read everything that takes my interest.
I have consciously been posting fewer blogs this year. Partly because I’ve a lot going on, but also because I don’t believe in posting simply to raise my profile. As I get older, I am increasingly more comfortable resisting doing the “things I should do”. I focus on what makes me happy.
Many of my friends haven’t made it to 2019 and I am therefore keenly aware that every day brings new possibilities and it’s up to me to make the best choice of what to do with my limited time on this planet.
I know what feeds my energy and makes me content. I make sure that, whatever commitments I have to others, meeting my own needs is also a priority. By looking after myself I am better able to contribute and help others.
Self-care takes dedication, planning, perseverance and resilience. Don’t let anyone tell you it’s selfishness. It’s about survival. It’s necessary.
By choosing what we focus on for our long-term aspirations, we give ourselves purpose and direction in moving towards a goal. An inspirational goal will almost pull you towards it, like a giant, powerful magnet. It could be financially or life-style oriented, or both, but make sure you frame it positively and can monitor your progress.
When you are driving a car, you check the horizon, look at what’s right in front of the vehicle, and check what’s in between. You need to do exactly the same when you are setting and monitoring goals. Don’t miss out on immediate or mid-range opportunities by staring into the future,
Divide BHAGs (“Big Hairy-Arsed Goals”) into smaller, achievable steps, and after you’ve achieved a few of those smaller goals (notice I’m resisting the temptation to calls these SHAGs) you will realise that you are already well on your way to where you’d always dreamed you might be.
Thank you for choosing to spend some of your time today reading this short article. I hope it’s started you thinking about what your own giant powerful magnet of a goal looks like.
Enjoy the journey, it’s just as important as your destination.